Dont knock it till you try it

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Hot dog.

Hot dog who?

Hot dog!

Hahahahha (forced laughter)

This is the scene currently playing out at our house. My 20 month old daughter came up with this knock, knock joke after hearing my son spout off all the ones he knows. Now she likes nothing better than to scream knock, knock at you all day long. And dont even think about not responding after she tells you it for the 36th time. Then you will have her brother on your patootie telling you to answer sissy and laugh properly at this joke that only Bodhi can understand. I am thinking it may be time to invest in a knock, knock, joke book....

HIGH HO!

Its off to work we go....well, not quite, I am going to be working from home. I am starting my own business. Well, not quite, but I am starting off on a new endeavor. I had decided to start doing boutique jewelry trunk shows. Yup, that is what I am calling it. Fine, I am basically selling jewelry out of my trunk, while finding an excuse to drink cocktails with my girlfriends and asking them to have more cocktail party trunk shows. But it is quality, fabulous, classic jewelry that I must possess...(pant, pant, pant) . Not to mention that my girlfriends will be able to get jewelry for free and severely discounted and all that jazz.

This is going to be interesting. Before I had the kids I worked in the real estate world. Thats what I know. I am not sure I am going to be successful working from home. Who is going to keep me motivated and on top of things...where will my assistant be?? But then there is the idea of being able to support my jewelry habit while consuming the fermented grape juice with my friends....my jewelry habit is so large I really should name her...if I gave her a name she could be my assistant! See! I called it! Maddox's dentist appointment did split my personality! I am sitting here thinking of a name for my jewelry addiction! It was a traumatic event...and no, I am still not emotionally ready to talk about it.

At the end of the day...

All day long and usually right before I fall asleep I find myself thinking about the kind of mother I want to be. How I want them to remember me. Affectionate and loving, fair and honest, even tempered and patient. Strong, a rock, someone they can always count on...yeah, usually this is after I have screamed like a harpy because they have been at each other's throats all day. Say... with, oh, I don't know.... what started out as a fight over an imaginary cookie in the play kitchen?

The flippin' thing is imaginary! Bake another one! It will take you about a millisecond! It is not even REAL! The next person to talk about, think about, tattle about, or look at the other person is in TIME OUT!

It's five o'clock somewhere, isn't it? I think I finally understand what cocktail hour is truly all about. In college I thought this was a great excuse to imbibe...now I realize I may need a cocktail at the end of the day to coax me from the fetal position in the corner and take me to my happy place. I actually came home and meditated after taking Maddox to the dentist the other day. My mantra? Breathe, breathe...but that is another entry for another day. I don't think I can go there emotionally yet. A frik frakkin imaginary cookie can ruin my day. The dentist incident may have actually split my personality it was so traumatic.

Obviously I am pretty large work in progress...

Rules for Teachers

Oh how the times have changed! I found this on a website

about one room school houses and simply had to share...no, I don't know why I was looking up one room school houses. I tend to wander on the internet...my own personal form of ADD.

Rules for Teachers
1872

1.	Teachers each day will fill lamps, clean chimneys.
2.	Each teacher will bring a bucket of water and a scuttle of coal for the day's session.
3.	Make your pens carefully. You may whittle nibs to the individual tastes of the pupils.
4.	Men teachers may take one evening each week for courting purposes, or two evenings a week if they go to church regularly.
5.	After ten hours in school, the teacher may spend the remaining time reading the Bible or other good books.
6.	Women teachers who marry or engage in unseemly conduct will be dismissed.
7.	Every teacher should lay aside each day a goodly sum of his earnings for his benefit during his declining years so he will not become a burden on society.
8.	Any teacher who smokes, uses liquor in any form, frequents pool or public halls, or gets shaved in a barber shop will give good reason to suspect his worth, intention, integrity and honesty.
9.	The teacher who performs his labor faithfully and without fault for five years will be given an increase of twenty-five cents per week in his pay, providing the Board of Education approves.
	(from Country School Legacy)